The perfect project - the photobook

Haven't written in a while, if only because this baby thing is time consuming, along with the other hundred things on my daily and weekly lists. And while this blog is supposed to an annual compilation of random yet important thoughts and observations about being a mom to little V, I secretly have got caught up in another similar project - the annual photobook.

I am somewhat obsessed with taking pictures - ask anyone - I am always snapping away and up until a  few years back, would get photos printed and put them in labelled albums (yes, there is type A popping up again...).  

Fast forward to the last year or two, and photobooks have become the latest rage.  Now after an important trip or event, I resort to amassing all my photos and putting my best creative input forward to produce amazing photobooks.  My sites of preference?  Definitely mypublisher.com and more recently, shutterfly.com.  which brings me to my current project...the annual photobook.  

Essentially, I made a commitment to myself that I would document Vanessa's first year in photos and thought it made the most sense to start building the book, as the year progresses, so I would not be overwhelmed by the volume of photos and how to organize the whole thing, at the end of the year.  So while I should be spending hours on composing content for this blog about little V, I am now spending hours on this yearbook.  Part of the all consuming nature of the project is because it is really about more than photos - you can put in stories, captions, and even scrapbook pages with virtual stickers and cut-outs.  Yes, I am officially obsessed with it.  

Hope V appreciates the love and labour that is put into the final product.

Vanessa - 21 weeks old

Vanessa - 20 weeks old

Vanessa - 19 weeks old

Viva Italia and what I have learned so far

First and foremost, I am happy to report that travelling with bebe was a breeze in Italy.  All my angst quickly went out the window once we got on the plane - she fell asleep for most of the flight and awoke just moments before we landed wanting a bottle. Can you say easy baby?  And things only got better - she slept through the night the entire time we were there and had no problems adjusting to the new time zone.  It is times like this that I actually contemplate travelling the world with her while I am on mat leave....

Daddy, Mommy & Vanessa in Assisi, Italy

I also have become introspective about Vanessa over the last few months - I can find myself lost in her face just thinking about the past and future as well as what could possibly going on in that wee brain of hers.  But most of the time I just take it all in, because I know how quick and fleeting this time with her will be.

What have I learned so far?

• that sleep deprivation isn't as scary as I thought it was going to be
• that a parent-led schedule works best for me
• that shopping for little girl clothes is one of the best activities in the world
• that nothing warms the heart more than your kid smiling at you
• that every milestone your baby hits is like them winning an Olympic gold medal
• that it is important to make time for yourself to recharge
• that taking a sleeping baby to get a manicure is a bad thing....because they always get up sooner than you think and your mani is never 100% dry
• that look of pure bliss in the morning, when they see you for the first time, is priceless 
• that a great Dad makes for a much happier family

Vanessa - 18 weeks old

Vanessa - 17 weeks old

 

Vanessa - 16 weeks old

 

 Vanessa - 15 weeks old

 

Have bucket and baby - will travel again

So here I go again - traveling with little miss V. And while I feel more or less worn in as a result of our recent travels, I am still somewhat concerned about this particular trip, since we are flying solo to Rome!

Eight hours on a flight with a four month old - what am I thinking? Three hours to Hilton Head is a wee bit different than eight hours - lots can happen (eg go wrong)  during that time.  However I am banking on the fact that V is a pretty chilled baby.  Unfortunately she is also predictable in that everyday is like groundhog day to her - I know what to expect from her and vice versa and so we rarely fall off course, if at all. So...I am about to turn her world upside down not only with an eight hour flight but also by changing time zones - yikes!! And this comes on the heels of the first night she has slept from 730 - 730. I guess I can say good bye to that golden nugget for a while....

The good thing is that I seem to have the plane organizing thing down pat as well as efficiently packing the right baby gear required for travel - the upside of being a somewhat seasoned traveler with a "bucket" baby.

So here's to la vita bella with bambina in Italy - all stress and craziness aside - it should be a trip to remember!

Vanessa - 14 weeks old

Vanessa - 13 weeks old

I am loving this

I thought I would be one of those career women, who no matter how they sliced it, would yearn for a cubicle over a change table or a computer bag over a diaper bag.  I guess because I was focused on achieving success in my professional life for such a long time, I thought I would never shake that mindset.....even with a bebe.

Enter Vanessa and how I was so wrong.

I secretly love getting up in the middle of the night (even if my eyes are burning).  Night nurse, pshaw. It is such a wonderful feeling to know this little life is counting on you to make them feel better and get them through to the next day.  And our routine of burning down each and every street in our neighborhood with our glistening Uppa Baby stroller, along with our morning trek to Starbucks is absolute heaven.  Work seems like such a distant memory and right now, I could not imagine outsourcing this to someone else to enjoy these daily moments with her.  As everyone reminds me, they are fleeting.

It already amazes me how she has rapidly transformed in such a short amount of time.  My little Vuvu is growing up so fast.

PS:  Traveling with her to Hilton Head and last week to Montreal to meet maman and all my gfriends was super easy.  She is a flying "rock star".

PPS:  Weight loss continues at a gradual pace.  So far my motto, which is getting me through on a daily basis is "try don't deny".  I have a mind of steel when it comes to self discipline esp when it comes to eating and shedding the pounds.

Vanessa - 12 weeks old

 Vanessa - 11 weeks old

Vanessa - 10 weeks old

Give Mommy Some Sugar....But Only in a Few Months

While I am officially at my 11 week post-baby mark, my body looks like it is locked at 11 weeks into my pregnancy.  Now I understand why it is so hard to lose that baby weight - for some like me, it literally feels attached with crazy glue.

Now don't get me wrong - I would not trade the 50lbs I gained for a bitch skinny body because I know those pounds were critical to little V's success.  In my mind, every pound was important.  And because I am 5'10, I carried it well.

So fast forward to today, and I still have 25 lbs to lose and I have been stuck in this plateau for the last three weeks. Now to be honest, it is not that I have been committed to the weight loss.  In fact, I have thrown caution to the wind and have been "pleasantly" eating.  Translation?  Haagen Dazs cookie dough ice cream is my best friend. Well sort of.  It prob takes me two days to finish a pint.  But you get the picture.

So this week I made a commitment to myself that I will drop the excess pounds and hope to rock a bikini by August when we head to Nantucket for our annual two weeks.  In order to help the process, I have posted a chart on our fridge for all to see to not only publicly out myself to all who come into our kitchen but to visually motivate me to stick to the plan.  J is also supposed to come along for the ride.  His high blood pressure, which was recently identified, is supposed to be his motivator.  As you can see below, he just got comfortable outing his weight......took him a week to post it.......he had not stepped on a scale for more than a year!

I think this exercise will also serve as a good role model for little V.  As a breast fed and formula fed baby (heavy on the latter), she is off the charts for her height and her weight.  However, I know this is temporary, since all babies do at the age is sit around, play toys with mom, spend a few minutes on their tummies and get carried around.  Plus, I love my buddha baby belly and know that once she hits that active stage, she will get to a healthy weight. And having a pair of good role models, who exercise and eat healthy should help that process!

Vanessa - 9 weeks old

 

 Vanessa - 10 weeks old

Vanessa - 11 weeks old

Can I do it? Travel with a 2 month old bebe?

They say you should do something everyday that scares you. While I don't engage in that action everyday, though I would like to, I am about to embark on my first trip with little miss Vanessa tomorrow, which does scare me a tad.  In fact, this one day of travel should last me at least one week's worth, if not two weeks worth of "scares".

The "scary" part of this trip is fear of the unknown as well as the fear of "everything going wrong" with Vanessa e.g her having a meltdown during the entire plane ride, Vanessa having a huge pooie diaper that explodes all over our seats and us, running out of bottles while on the plane, and losing our passports and my mind, just to name a few. I never had these types of anxieties before - I'm actually not an anxious person BUT travelling alone with my daughter seems to have created this neverending list of "what if" scenarios in my head.  

But like most things in my life, once I tackle something at least once that I have deemed "scary",  the scaredycat in me is released and I will have no problem doing it again.  Wish me luck!

 Vanessa - 8 weeks old

Le birth announcement

Call me old fashioned - but I just love a beautiful birth announcement (In fact, I love all paper products, cards, stationery, etc. .....but that's another story.) And that is why weeks before little miss Vanessa was born, I spent hours combing through various catalogues and websites, looking for sample templates (yup, there is that type A in me, coming through loud and clear).  I narrowed it down to a few, convinced dear hubby of the necessity,  and we picked our winner template a few weeks ago.

As far as birth announcements go, I am in love with the layout and design - classic, clean and elegant  - quite fitting for a spirited and beautiful creature like Vanessa.  It is her official "calling card" - letting everyone know that she has arrived - so I want to make sure it makes a lasting, yet stylish impression. And did I mention that I also love those belly and thigh rolls of her - so yummy!

Part of the success of such an announcement are the picts and I have to thank dear hubby for that.  No, he wasn't the photographer, but he splurged with an extravagant "push present" - a sitting with a newborn photographer who did an outstanding job.  We both agree that the five hours spent in her studio with Vanessa were precious memories that we will forever treasure. The investment was a small fortune, but well worth every cent.  I can't get enough of my wee beauty!

Hard to believe that the weeks are flying by and how much she is evolving - so I will continue to capture them well.    

Vanessa - 6 weeks old

Vanessa - 7 weeks old

The Good, the bad and no ugly

The Good?  My wee Vanessa keeps on getting more beautiful and delicious each and every day.  While I have been delinquent at posting for the last few weeks, I come by it honestly.  See below for how "bad" it has been.

The Bad?  I have been remiss at posting because of a double whammy mastitis attack.  Yes, twice  and in the same boob a few days apart.  Hell hath no fury like a woman who has mastitis.  Ask my husband. It feels like a combination of the flu, getting into a fight and being pelted in the chest and taking an overdose of sleeping medication.  Oh - and I forgot to mention that you have to continue nursing and pumping to make sure that the pain does not escalate.  How is that for chinese torture? 

No Ugly? Yup, no ugly around here.  While I considered categorizing the mastitis as "ugly", it really does not deserve that moniker.  Even though I do not wish that type of pain on anyone, it is temporary and goes away, almost as fast as it makes its ugly entrance.  Overall, these first weeks of babydom have been pretty groovy - so much so that I would do it again in a heartbeat.

 Vanessa - 4 weeks old

 Vanessa - 5 weeks old

Hell hath no fury like a baby's stink

It's great being a Mom - and it keeps getting better. And while there are plenty of moments that take my breath away - there are also plenty of moments that make me scratch my head and take away my breath. I wonder if I will ever understand the following:

How can such a beautiful infant produce such rancid and pungent gas? Honestly, Daddy and I think we live with a truck driver sometimes. I supplement breastfeeding with formula, but I have yet to hear any other moms talk about their baby's stink. And Vanessa -- your stink has been memorable these past few weeks.

Let's hope it's not a permanent thing.

Vanessa - 3 weeks old

You've Been Inked!

So our wee baby was finally named this week - and while it took us a good two weeks to commit to a name, we are thrilled with the result - Vanessa Madaket Roy or as Daddy loves to say my "Maddy". 

There were at least a dozen names that were considered - from Olivia to Ava to Megan to Jadyn. And while the above names are all beautiful in their own right, Daddy J and I could not agree on one until Vanessa.

For example, Olivia and Ava were too posh and prissy for Daddy who could not see you running across a soccer field with either of those monikers. And after staring at you for the last few weeks, I did not see any bits of a Megan, even though it is a lovely name. And finally, while we did love Jadyn, we soon discovered Britney Spears has a son with the same label - enough said.

And while Daddy was hooked on giving you Madaket as your first name (after our fave beach in Nantucket), I felt strongly about ensuring that your future would not be filled with a unique first name which would be mostly misspelled and mispronounced. You can bark at me in the years to come if you don't agree.

Vanessa was a given - it was literally destiny or "in the stars" for you. I say this because, the first item I purchased for your room was the following plaque below:

So it was only fitting that we chose Vanessa as your name - since Vanessa means "from the stars". And we feel truly blessed and lucky that the heavens delivered you to us.

Little Miss Vanessa - 2 weeks old

Happy First Week Birthday!

So this weekend marks Little Miss TBD's first week with us.  Hard to believe that a week has already flown by, how much she has changed and how much Baby Daddy J and I have learned.  

What have I learned so far?  Here are my top five lessons:  

1. Be as organized and prepared as possible BEFORE baby comes - buy what you need and add extra, because that first week will be a blur and you will want to be a shut in, especially in the winter.  This includes Always with Wings, Tylenol, comfy underware and a comfy shut-in nursing outfit.
2. Resist the urge to entertain tons of friends and relatives in the first few days - enjoy family time with just you, hubby and baby and savor the special  time.  It only happens once.
3. Stock up on food, especially fibre foods like fruits, veggies and meals that can be easily frozen and defrosted.
4. Breastfeeding is hard but so worth it.  Nothing is better than having baby nuzzled next to your chest while providing her with the best nourishment.
5. Remember to take photos and videos each and every week to document baby's growth and changes.

Little Miss TBD - one week old

What's in a name?

So our beautiful bundle of "pink" joy arrived at 5:35 am, last Friday, February 10th, 2012.  I'll be honest - I thought "she" was going to be a "he" and I came about it quite honestly. Hence, why "she" still has no name and remains Little Miss TBD.

Little Miss TBD just moments after she was born

About three weeks ago, I had my last ultrasound, to ensure all was fine. I made a specific request to the technician not to reveal the sex of the baby, since we wanted to be surprised.  And what does she end up doing? Using the personal pronoun "he" to document the various organs and positions of the baby to me.  My inner voice wanted to strangle her but I remained calm and proceeded to deal with the reveal.  I was disappointed to find the gender of the baby under such circumstances, but was elated to find out that baby was healthy.

As soon as I got to work, I googled "ultrasound technician stupidity" and was shocked to find out that "accidental gender reveals" occurs more often than one would think. More importantly, it stated not to put too much stock into the pronouns used to describe the examination, since some techs prefer to use one gender over another, regardless of what they see on the screen. 

Over the next few weeks, I proceeded to keep the secret to myself and went about purchasing gender neutral clothes or as Tori so eloquently put it - a potential lesbian wardrobe.  But I was fairly certain that the technician was correct in what she saw, coupled with the fact that all my weight was in my stomach - an old wives' tale that one is carrying a boy. See for yourself.

Mama Foxy at 36 weeks

So imagine my surprise when little miss TBD popped out - I was completely unprepared for my pink estrogen bundle, especially in the name department.  I had steered my baby daddy in a boy name direction, without revealing to him the ultrasound technician debacle.  I figured that it was so remote that we were having a girl, that spending time on choosing a girls' name was time not well spent - and so, I now find myself with one beautiful baby girl, with no name.


So what is in a name? Personally, I think so much is at stake, that as of day five post birth, she remains nameless.  Baby Daddy J and I can not agree on a suitable name that we both love and adore.  And most importantly, because she is going to be saddled with this moniker for the rest of her life, I want to ensure we have given it plenty of thought and that she "fits" the name.  I have met plenty of people who hate their name and so I want to make sure that I don't provide her with a label that she will hold against me for the rest of my life.

While we have a "list" of names and some lead contenders, there is still no resolution.  However, we do agree that her name should be meaningful, have the ability to be easily shortened into a somewhat hip nickname and provide the kid with a title that she can wear proudly.  


So what do you think this bundle of pinkness AKA Little Miss TBD, deserves as her official title? Is she an Ava, Olivia, Avery, Ella, Vanessa, Jayden, Alyssa, Madison or a Madaket?

Little Miss TBD - two days old

Much ado about nothing? I don't think so...

As I bid adieu to this pregnancy (I am two days past my due date), I look back with nothing but fond memories of my belly, my adoration of maternity clothes (I think I am the only person who feels this way), and ensuring that I ate well (with the exception of my new love of soda pop) and often.  The only thing that drove me nuts and continues to do so, is the lack of courtesy that most TTC riders extend to pregnant commuters like myself.  

Over the last ten months,  I can count on one hand the number of times that a man or woman has offered up their seat to me.  Now I don't expect it to happen everytime I ride the subway or the bus (seeing as many people have commented that my figure wasn't exactly screaming pregnant for the longest time), but it does start to get to you when other people quickly grab a seat and you are left huffing and puffing after trying to make a speedy dash (at least a valiant attempt) for it. 

For the most part, I was left to stand for 30 minutes during the morning rush hour over the last several months, which is no easy feat for my "cankles", which are screaming to have a break.  And while I am sure my facial expressions, my tummy patting and my himming and hawing may have amused some commuters, it never really served its original purpose - to call attention to my discomfort and get one of the handful of seated TTC riders to offer up their seat.  An exercise in futility.

I know that I speak for other pregnant commuters that are generally shocked at the utter ignorance displayed by fellow transit riders.  While I could chalk it up to my amazing style selection that has camouflaged my pregnancy,  I am not going to let my Toronto subway dwellers get off so easily.  In this day and age, I have witnessed more and more individuals so focused on "tuning out" with IPhones and Blackberries, that they barely look up to acknowledge who they are riding with on the subway.  Then there are those people (you know who you are), who look me up and down, recognize that I am pregnant, and then choose to continue sitting and punching the keys on their electronic device because they feel entitled to the seat.

How to fix problem? Well, in a perfect world, the TTC would embark on a public education campaign to drive awareness about the importance of giving up a seat to those who are disabled, elderly and of course, pregnant.  And it also doesn't hurt to start teaching our young the importance of courtesy and respect when it comes to these select populations and why we should be giving up seats and making it easier for them to travel and park.

I only wish that the Toronto subway cars and buses had more signs like these below - they could take a lesson or two from Home Depot and Canadian Tire, who know their customer and have taken the right steps to accommodate them and in their own way, create an educational snapshot for others to hopefully learn from and pass on.

The thrill of expecting - is there a list for that?

It is delivery day minus a week and my excitement is growing.  It's like waiting for your fave house guest to arrive.

I feel fully prepared, organized and on top of things - but as every girlfriend has told me, even the most As of type As are never fully prepared for what baby brings.

So for now, I will find solace, in crossing items off the master "before baby comes" list such as life insurance, giving stuff to good will (for the tenth time) and making as many meals as our freezer can hold.

It sounds like after the wee one arrives that my list may be turning yellow before I attend to it again.  Will I be able to survive without crossing things off a list on a daily basis??